Comedian Dane Cook delivers laughs with 'Rough Around the Edges Tour'

11/28/07 - As Dane Cook would put it, "[He] is one silly bitch."On Saturday, Nov. 17, Dane Cook put on not just one show, but two shows at the TD Banknorth Garden in Boston, Mass.

A comedy show can either be a hit or a miss. I was hesitant to attend the Dane Cook "Rough Around the Edges Tour," because of the possibility that I would be sitting through a two-hour show of old jokes that have been heard for several years.

The words echoed in my mind from students who weren't interested in going: "He is so two years ago." But the truth is, Dane Cook is so.now.

When the first show let out around 9:30, my friends and I quickly scurried over to the TD Banknorth Garden to get in line for the 10:30 p.m. show. We entered the arena at around 10:00 p.m. and walked up flight, after flight, after flight to our balcony seats. A friend called me and explained that she wouldn't be joining us because she had gotten a free upgrade on her seats to the lower section. Soon enough, my friends and I had received the same free upgrade, and were moved closer to the stage.

I feel bad for the people who paid the $75 for those seats, when we had paid just $45. But I saved some money.

Then the show began. The lights dimmed and the screens that hung above the middle of the stage began playing an introduction for Dane Cook. After a three-minute introduction, Cook revealed himself as he came running out of a lower tunnel. Dressed in a Boston Red Sox jersey he high-fived audience members around him. "HELLLLO BOSTON!"

Immediately the crowd stood up clapping and cheering and Cook went into a series of cheers for Boston teams as he stripped off his Red Sox jersey to reveal a Boston Celtics jersey, and then once more stripped to reveal the New England Patriots T-shirt that he would sport for the rest of the show.

Cook began the show by joking about the upcoming holiday, Thanksgiving. He commented on how Thanksgiving talk is always so awkward and strange. He discussed how there's that one Thanksgiving where everyone just discusses what the best way of going about killing each other would be, before going on a tangent about the worst way to die.

He commented on how people die each year from a coin being dropped on their head. "You're just walking down the street, and then bam, suddenly you're in heaven, because a coin was dropped and hit you in the head."

Cook went through several other silly ways of dying, and also several ways of killing someone and getting rid of the evidence. After Dane's killing spree (non-literal) he began putting down police officers -at least 20 surrounded the stage - saying that there are good ones and bad ones. Then he discussed the ways that people react when a cop pulls them over, or doesn't. "You all know that the best feeling in the world is when a cop is behind you and then he just takes a left."

He began another series of jokes by saying, "One time I lived in New York," before receiving several thousand boos from the audience. "Ok so one time I lived in Delaware," he continued. He then spent the next 40 minutes telling jokes that some comedians might not dare even go attempt.

He started off with a joke about sex with a mannequin and how one's girlfriend would react if she found out that a man dreamed of having sex with one, and then moved on to girl's comments on the odor of a guy's body parts below the belt. "Well let me tell you girls something, you don't smell so good down there either sometimes. One time I went to go down, and I just came right back up."

Following these jokes, Cook discussed the feelings going through a male's mind when he just can't find a condom and how he hoped the condom fairy would appear. A few fans threw condoms up on stage. Cook picked them up; "Too small," he said and threw them off. He told several more sex jokes, including one about a gay roommate he once had, before yelling "Thank you and good night," and running off the stage.

The crowd gave Cook a standing ovation. Then people started filing out of their seats before Cook reappeared and came back on stage. The audience started rushing back into the complex to their seats, and Cook finished the show, with two old jokes, before marking his exit with his signature car alarm background sound. "Thank you Boston, and good night!